Last Updated on February 15, 2023
Are you just one of those men who put 100% trust in your lady through thick and thin? When starting a new relationship, you would want to believe you have her heart fully. Unfortunately, things are not always black and white, especially when children are involved. There can be a chance that she still holds feelings for her baby daddy.
Are you starting to feel something may be awry? How do you know you are not a rebound guy? What should you do if she is still in love with her baby daddy? Here is the answer to all your problems!
Signs She Still Loves Her Baby Daddy
1. She talks about him all the time
On your date night, she often casually mentions how her ex used to take her here or how the meal reminds her of his cooking. And when you plan a small trip together, she will bring up how her ex took her to the best beach in Mexico.
She is revisiting these memories in her mind and cannot hold them back even when she is with you.
2. His photos are still in the house
When you first took the invitation to her place, did your spine shiver to see his photos up on the walls? That is a valid feeling. You do not have to justify this on her behalf.
There is no reason for someone to hang their ex’s photos when they are ready to date someone new. It is respectful to remove the ex from the picture. She should talk to him about co-parenting and maintaining a friendly relationship, but his photos should not be visibly shown.
3. She uses the baby as an excuse to see him
The topic can get very sensitive when there is a kid involved. At the end of the day, the child is innocent and deserves both daddy and mommy.
However, it is easy to spot when she is using the baby as an excuse to get close to her ex. For example, making up parental meetings at school when there isn’t one. Or just creating small household incidents such as broken pipes.
You know it is a made-up excuse when you see the excitement on her face. If it is just a normal, friendly co-parenting style, she will not be showing the same happiness. Besides, the frequency of these supposed “urgent” meetings is way too much to be a coincidence.
Maybe you have taken some glances over your girl’s phone at breakfast and saw that she is stalking the ex. That’s not a good sign. Your girl wants to know what her baby daddy is up to lately.
Have a look at what she comments on his photos, if it is like an ambiguous or sexually suggestive emoji like a peach or an eggplant, look out, there can be something fishy there.
5. She does not like his new relationships
Leaving a relationship means you are no longer a part of their life. They are free to date whoever they want and you should not feel anything.
Just like how your girlfriend has started to date you, her baby daddy is probably doing the same. She should not have any negative sentiments toward that.
When she learns that her ex has a new relationship and presents herself in a very jealous way, it can only mean she does not want him to move on. She is still emotionally attached to her past.
6. Her friends and family are more supportive of her ex but not you
Unfortunately for you, your girlfriend’s family and friends are going to be more supportive of her and not you. Since your relationship is still new, they are likely to know more about her feelings than you do.
Her family is supportive of her holding onto her feelings shows they know how she has not moved on and believe she needs to give this another try. As miserable as it sounds, even her family knows you are the rebound guy.
What to Do If She Still Loves Her Baby Daddy?
Granted, it is very difficult to lose the love for the child’s father as they probably have been through a lot. Maybe she is just getting sentimental. Either way, it should not be at the expense of your happiness.
You need to acknowledge that he will always have a special spot in her heart as the father of their child. It doesn’t necessarily mean she wants to be in a romantic relationship with him.
You can be there for her by encouraging her to open up about her past relationships. Sometimes, all she needs is to talk it out. Chat with her to see if therapy will be a good option. A professional can offer solutions without sounding biased or judgmental. It is a safe place for her soul. Seeing a therapist is a good way to get rid of the unhealthy obsession and start a new life.
New mothers that have gone through a traumatic breakup recently will struggle to let go, no matter how toxic the previous relationship is. A therapist can guide her to stand up on her own again and rebuild her faith in love.
As much as you can be there for her, it is not your job to rationalize her feelings or actions. This is especially true if the father is still in the picture and you have no right to end their co-parenting life.
Ultimately, if she is making you uncomfortable, you have the right to talk about it or walk away. Time can heal. Perhaps in time, she will finally drop him off her mind but there is no guarantee of that. Choosing to stay means you have to accept the consequences. You can only guide her but cannot blame her for not moving on.
When all the signs pile up and you decide you can no longer take it, leave peacefully. Talk to her about her residual feelings and how it might be healthy for her to find her closure first.
Do not be the angry partner to accuse her of cheating or lying. She has been through a lot and she is confused about the situation as well.
How Involved Should You be in Her Baby’s Life?
You want to be the perfect partner and potentially the perfect step-dad to her baby. But, there is the century-old question of how involved should you be in her baby’s life and how early on in the relationship should you take up some parenting responsibilities?
There is no defining moment for this. The duration of your relationship does not limit your involvement. It should be a mutually comfortable agreement.
What you need to be aware of is that you cannot escape the commitment if you are looking for a long-term relationship. Your girl is going to put her baby first. Dating her means eventually you will be part of the baby’s life too.
Once you are willing to accept that, have a talk with her to see what she feels about the situation. Make a schedule to gradually introduce you to the responsibilities ahead and let the baby get to know you.
She might be more protective of her child at first. This is by no means a rejection of your love. As a mother, she has to think about how it will impact her child to introduce every man she dates before the relationship is stable. She may want to wait until things are clear between you two.
Take baby steps when branding yourself as the new father figure in the family. With or without the biological father in the picture, you should handle this delicate matter gently for the sake of the child.
Begin with some hangouts in the house together. Let the baby know you are not a stranger. Then, you can start to be there for nap time or bedtime stories.
When you feel empowered, ask to babysit when your girl is busy. All this takes courage and it is never easy. You do not need to rush yourself into anything. Take things slow as there will be a learning curve for you as well.
Best Online Dating Sites
Find someone that is ready to date and not here to break hearts. The best way to match with your dream girl is to sign up for these online dating sites!
- Adult FriendFinder
- Ashley Madison
- Bang Locals
Sharing her love with her baby daddy is the cruelest thing. No one deserves the heartbreak. There is only so much you can do about someone’s love toward their ex. If the signs in this article describe your girlfriend, it might be a good time to reconsider your relationship.
This is not something you want to go through again. To avoid another love trauma, be aware of who you date and find someone that is on the playing field on the online dating sites mentioned above.