6 Strong Signs He’ll Never Marry You & Taking You For Granted
by John Santana
As you deal with the various ups and downs of a new or old relationship, you might wonder the question every person wonders about a potential romance “Where is this going?” If you are looking for your boyfriend to marry you, the first step might be signs of commitment. Then you might start looking for signs that he is planning to marry you.
However, whether your boyfriend promises you’ll get married or states that he doesn’t want to get married, you need to look past his words. Instead, look at his actions. There are plenty of signs that your boyfriend is planning to marry you or move the relationship forward, but there are also plenty of other signs that he isn’t planning to marry you.
Here are some of those signs that he isn’t planning to marry you in the future. You need to make a plan based on that information. Now, keep in mind that just because he doesn’t want to marry you, that doesn’t always mean that he doesn’t love you or there is another woman in his life. There could be plenty of reasons why marriage isn’t on the table.
So it might be time to have a conversation and have a talk with your boyfriend to figure things out. Again, being married or not being married isn’t a bad thing that will destroy your relationship. Clear communication is key.
1. The Guy Doesn’t Move The Relationship Forward
No one wants to be stuck in a rut with a relationship, and getting stuck in a relationship can happen on both sides. Work, other obligations, outside issues, and general busyness can slow a relationship down and cause both partners to take a relationship for granted. However, if you are trying to move the relationship forward and the man is being resistant, then that can be a negative sign.
One big movement is moving in together. For example, if you and your boyfriend have an opportunity to move in together, but he moves into a place of his own or moves in with a roommate, then that could be a sign that he wants to keep the relationship less serious than it is.
Other big steps can include going on a vacation together or meeting the parents, and if you haven’t done that at least a year into your relationship, then you might need to question how serious the relationship is.
2. He Says He Doesn’t Want To Get Married
Sometimes guys don’t want to get married and they will tell you so upfront. Maybe they saw their own parent’s marriage fall apart, or don’t think that marriage is necessary. Often, most guys will tell you that they don’t want to get married upfront, and that is how it is going to be.
Now, don’t try to change his mind or think that ‘he will want to get married if I just pester him enough.’ Instead, either try to build a life and a relationship without getting married, or you might want to move on and find a guy who does want to get married.
Most guys mean what they say whenever they don’t want to get married, or they don’t believe in marriage. Again, you can have a happy and healthy relationship without wedding bells, but if he doesn’t want to get married and you do, that is something to think about.
3. He Downplays the Relationship’s Seriousness
If you are going out with your boyfriend, chances are he wants to show you off and tell everyone that he is dating you. If you’ve been in a long-term relationship and have been around town together, but he doesn’t tell your friends that he is dating you or he tells people that you aren’t that serious together despite your long-term romance, then he might not be serious about you.
Also, if he isn’t telling people about the fact that you are dating, then he probably isn’t going to publicly tell the world he loves you by marrying you. Especially if he isn’t introducing you to his parents or his close friends, or is willing to meet yours, then that is a real red flag.
He should care that his friends and family really like you, and invite you along to family functions or to spend time with close friends. Plus, he should want to meet your family and friends too!
4. He Makes Excuses Not To Talk About The Future
In a long-term relationship, talking about future plans is something that is going to happen. Whether you plan to get married, have a pet together, or move into one house, that is something that needs to be discussed over the long term.
If your boyfriend is avoiding the talk about the future or gets defensive and becomes conflicted about your future plan, then you might need to see what is going on.
Additionally, your boyfriend might also seem unconcerned about the future as well. He might react to your own future plans with apathy and is disinterested, or he might make plans for his future without considering you.
It probably means that he doesn’t want to talk about marriage, and he doesn’t want to be pressured about future plans, or doesn’t see you as someone who he wants to spend his long-term time with. He might also make a lot of continuous excuses not to get married, and while some of the excuses to wait for marriage (such as having the money and being financially stable) make sense, others might seem very flimsy.
If things are going well and he still doesn’t want to get married, and he keeps moving the goalposts and wants to keep on waiting before marriage, you need to consider that he is avoiding asking you to marry him.
5. He Lives Like He Is Single And Detaches From You Emotionally
Whenever a real and true relationship exists for people, then both partners are going to be close together and be vulnerable with one another. If a man is willing to let his walls down and be vulnerable with you, then he sees a future with you and wants to let you know that you are important in his life.
However, if he is building up walls and not connecting with you emotionally, then you might not be as close as you thought you were.
Additionally, some guys enjoy the bachelor lifestyle and like to live like they are single. Going out to bars, drinking too much, looking at other women, and not taking too much responsibility for life is a big problem.
Now, going to bars and having some fun with people can be fun for couples in a relationship, but if he is only doing it without you, then you might want to question the seriousness of the relationship.
6. At The End Of The Day, You Aren’t A Priority
One of the best ways that people share that they are in a romantic relationship is by sharing it on social media. They want to be connected on social media and also post things like shared pictures, vacations they’ve been on, and other milestones in their romantic life.
If he is on social media but doesn’t make any mention of you or make any action to connect with you or react to your posts, then he might be trying to appear single on his social media.
Finally, if you feel like you aren’t a priority and the things you want to discuss aren’t being discussed, or you are constantly being blown off so he could hang out with other friends, then you might figure out that he isn’t willing to marry you.
What Do You Do If He Won’t Marry You
Ask Yourself if Everything Else is Good in the Relationship
First, consider your relationship as a whole. If you have a long-term relationship where you feel like you are being taken for granted, or you think that “If we just got married, then everything will be okay,” or if you have some serious problems where you feel like you aren’t a girlfriend and more of a side chick, then you might want to walk away from the relationship as a whole.
Marriage won’t fix your problems. If you decide that marriage will solve your problems, then you might be in for a rough road and a wedding might make everything much worse.
Communicate
However, if you have been in a long-term relationship and things aren’t moving toward marriage, then you need to communicate with your boyfriend and see what happens. Many guys really love their girlfriends and want to spend their lives together, but they don’t want to get married for various reasons.
They might not see the point of getting married, might be resistant to the idea of marriage due to some problems in their past, or simply don’t believe in marriage. Now, that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t love you or that the relationship is completely doomed to failure.
You both might be able to make the relationship work and might be able to have a happy, strong, and growing relationship without getting married at all.
Ask if They Might Change Their Mind
Now, if you desperately want to get married and you won’t take no for an answer, try to talk to your partner. You might be able to work through your issues together and change his mind. But if you can’t or have waited for several years without even a hint of marriage, you might need to let this man go.
Sit down and have a frank conversation with your partner about how you want to get married and how it is important to you. If he doesn’t want to get married, then you might have some differences that can’t be resolved, and if marriage is something that you know you want, then you shouldn’t have to give that up for someone who will never marry you.
Cut Your Losses
If you want to get married, and marriage is non-negotiable for you, then you might need to cut your losses and leave. There are plenty of guys that will want to marry you and will give you what you want out of life. You owe it to yourself to find them!
Make Sure The Relationship Is Growing
One of the biggest problems for relationships is a lack of growth. You might fall into a routine or a rut and just be content for a while, but eventually, the lack of growth is going to cause some problems and maybe even some resentment between the two of you. Marriage is one of the ultimate forms of growth for a couple and a relationship, and even if you don’t get married, you do want to make sure the relationship is growing.
If the two of you aren’t going on a vacation together, moving in together, or going through some other form of growth in your relationship, you might have to let the relationship go. You can’t depend on a stagnant relationship to make you happy, and if your romance is remaining still, then you need to either have a conversation with your partner or walk away from them entirely and see someone else.
Look For The Signs And Have The Conversation
Start to look for the signs of your boyfriend not wanting to marry you, and then, as hard as it might be or as much as he resists, you need to have a conversation with him. Talk to your boyfriend and figure out what is happening in your relationship, and get a clear answer on whether or not marriage is on the table.
Then you can either make a plan with your boyfriend, or you can start looking for a new relationship that will lead to the growth that you want.
Either way, you’ll take some stress off your shoulders and have a real plan for moving forward in your love life!
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