Sex vs Making Love: Real Difference and Comparision

by John Santana

Most people think that both making love and having sex comprises of similar physical activities and there is absolutely no difference. But if you think correctly, then there is a major difference between the two which is why both of these terms are used differently.

Today we will be talking about the major differences between making love and having sex so that you can understand the division.

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Sex Vs Making Love


  • Difference in purpose

Let’s be honest here whenever you are talking about having sex your main motivation is to get hold of the climax and enjoy the orgasm. Then your only purpose is to get hold of any person who seems sexually advanced and sleep with him or her to get your physical satisfaction from the individual. Of course, there is a connection during the intimate hours, but it is temporary.

But when you are thinking about making love, then there are hundreds of emotions which are churning inside you. That is the time when you feel like emotionally connecting with the person and taking care of him or her, and here the physical satisfaction is a secondary purpose.

During your lovemaking sessions, you not only want to gain hold over his or her body but also their heart and soul. Unlike having sex here, you want to explore the body of your partner in every possible way.

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  • Difference in communication

When you are having sex the jargons that you use absolutely dirty and is somewhat connected to the activities that you are doing. Even if you are not a big fan of sexy talk, then also you will be communicating about how you want to the things to end about the level of sexiness and so on. Mostly the communication is about the physical attributes and the Expectations that you want, and the communicative is more of lust than of love.

When you are making love even the pattern of communication changes. It helps two people bond and has an emotional attachment. We are not saying that in case of making love, you do not get to have a sexy talk, but it gives the couples enough chances to open up and give each other space. While making love, the couples generally talk about how much they are into each other and how much more they can connect.

  • Difference invulnerability

In case of having sex, it is all about finishing off and getting a pleasurable time together. It is all about physical satisfaction, and that is the reason why in case of having sex people are not that vulnerable. Here the purpose is to get off and be done with the orgasm, so there is no vulnerability involved in the same.

However, when we talk about love making the couples seem to be extremely vulnerable because they are emotionally attached to each other. The talk about a lot of things share each one of their secrets, and in points of intimacy they might even end up spilling out the darkest of Secrets. Therefore, after any lovemaking session, the couple seems to be absolutely vulnerable because whenever you are connecting with someone’s vulnerability is a must.

  • Difference in personality

If you want to get the physical satisfaction out of somebody, then you might even pretend to be someone else and have a temporary personal development just to impress the other person. In real life, the scenario might be absolutely different and you might be a complete introvert while you are trying to impress the other person by showing how much of an extrovert and cheerful person you actually are.

When we talk about love making the couples are actually showcasing the ideal person that you actually are because you do not want to deceive the person that you love. Making love is not about having your physical lust satisfied, because you really want to connect with the other person and be yourself. When you are making love, there is absolutely no place for some other person or personality, and even if you were vulnerable, you would take the risk.

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  • Difference in presence

Why you are having sex your mind can be in different directions, and you might not be engrossed in the act totally. You might not admit it, but you might be fantasizing about a completely different person that you want and Imagine being with him or her even while you are sharing intimacy with someone else. Having sex does not require any sort of concentration or emotional attachment, and that is the reason why even if you are present bodily your mind may not be present at the moment.

Making love is completely different when it comes to showing your presence. When two people are in love and are sharing their intimate moments, they would not let their Minds wander off even for a second. In fact, they would be absolutely engrossed within each other and would show their presence as much as they possibly can. After all, making love is a unique experience and nobody wants to miss out any second of it.

  • The postcoital expression is different

When you are having sex right after you’re done, you will hardly find any feelings for the other person. This is because your activities were more out of lust than love, and that is the reason why both of you might roll off to sleep. This shows that both of you do not have any attachment towards each other.

But once you are done making love, you will still search for each other’s intimacy and talk about your experience to make the other person happy and delighted. It is more of an emotional bonding rather than a physical bonding. The postcoital expression is quite fluent when you are making love.

As an end note, we would like to add that both the terms having sex and making love might seem similar as far as activities are involved, but if you talk about the Psychology, they are poles apart.

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John Santana

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