dating nigerian men

How to Date Nigerian Men

by John Santana

Nigerians are some of the best people in the world. They’re friendly and can engage in a fun conversation with just about anyone. Taking pride in their colorful heritage, Nigerians will welcome you to their culture with open arms. Because of their magnetic energy, a lot of people find Nigerians so endearing, which is also why some prefer to date one. 

However, the dating scene in Nigeria is quite different, and there are some things you need to learn and keep in mind before you start dating Nigerian men.

Understanding Nigerian Culture

In Nigeria, men take the lead. Their society is patriarchal in nature, and they place great significance on a man’s role in the family compared to other African countries. In a family setting, the father is the breadwinner and the decision-maker. 

Nigerians have strong family ties too; in fact, marriage is expected for adults when they approach the age of 30. When Nigerians love, they show it through acts of service. Not a lot of Nigerian men are verbally romantic; they prefer to show their love and care by providing for the one they love and giving gifts.

Meeting Nigerian Men

If you’re looking to date a Nigerian man, you can easily download online dating apps and find him there. Bingdum and Tinder are just some of the most popular dating apps in Nigeria. You can also attend Nigerian events and festivals, where you can personally meet them and immerse them in their culture. Lastly, you can join Nigerian community organizations to get to know them better.

It goes without saying that you’ve got to make a lasting impression. You have to stand out among the others. Show him you’re really interested in getting to know him while looking and feeling your best. Nigerians love people who can cook, so why not cook him traditional food the next time you meet?

Dating Nigerian Men

There are plenty of reasons why people prefer dating a Nigerian man. Generally speaking, they’re caring, responsible, and easygoing. They’re generous—they can treat you to a good meal, they’ll give you gifts without any occasion, and they’ll spend a lot of time with you. They’re very good providers. You can ask him to bond with you, and he’ll gladly oblige. It’s the way they love. A lot of times they’ll be indirect with their wants and needs, but you’ll feel their love nonetheless.

Nigerians also like to ask about people’s well-being. Build a connection with him by constantly asking him how he is. Treat him with respect, and make him feel loved in the best way you know how.

Cultural Differences in Dating

Nigerians and Africans in general have different views on love and relationships. It’s especially common in interracial dating. Though they’re not entirely against foreigners, they may not easily trust you if you’re not a part of their tribe. In some rural areas, Nigerians are pretty conservative. Liberal women who drink and party are still deemed indecent. Also, dating is not for long; Nigerian men are pressured to marry when they approach the age of 30. In Nigerian culture, marriage is an achievement. It is the foundation of having a family, which is part of their tradition.

However, Nigerians are very open-minded. Some are open to the modern dating culture, and they’ve got no problem dating someone who’s not from their culture. However, when it comes to dating, you may notice that they’re not very romantic. For some, showing emotions is not expected of a man. You may never see him as weak and upset because Nigerian men are raised like that.

What Nigerian Men Find Appealing

Nigerian men like people who are domesticated, mainly because of their patriarchal society. They view a woman as someone who takes care of the family, does household chores, and lives a modest life. They want to be in a relationship with someone who’s also hardworking and intelligent. They like someone who can appreciate them as providers.

But when dating a Nigerian man, you have to accept that there may be things that surprise you in your relationship. As mentioned, they’re not very romantic, so don’t expect them to be expressive and do romantic stuff in public. Also, most Nigerian families disapprove of cohabitation, especially if you’re not married. It’s against their culture, so if you’re thinking of moving in with him, you have to discuss it with him.

Differences in Lifestyle and Etiquette

In most parts of Nigeria, they still practice traditional gender roles. Men must be dominant, and women must be submissive. Also, they have a very hierarchical society; age and social status demand respect. Nigerian elders are honored and treated with the utmost respect. In marriage, it is expected that Nigerians have two to three weddings. They have unique and interesting wedding traditions too. Cultural norms are ingrained in Nigerian society, and once you’re dating a Nigerian man, you’ll eventually learn about all these traditions.

Challenges and Considerations

Here comes the hard part: the potential challenges that may arise when dating a Nigerian man. It’s expected in mixed-race dating that there will be cultural differences, so you need to be ready for difficult situations. One of the challenges you would expect is that polygamy is accepted in northern Nigeria. So if you’re only looking to date one man in your life, you must discuss this with your partner. 

Another thing to note is that homosexuality is still frowned upon in Nigeria. Worse, they criminalize those who date within the same gender. It can be hard for LGBTQ+ people to date Nigerian men, but if you decide to push through, there’s a big chance that his Nigerian family will disapprove of it once things get serious.

Of course, not a lot of Nigerians still adhere to their customs and traditions. Some who have been exposed to other kinds of dating and modern relationships will be open to compromise. So as long as you have healthy discussions about each other’s cultures, you’ll be fine. 

Never insult or look down on their culture, and always be accepting of new ideas. If some of their acts do not sit well with you, it’s either you’ve got to compromise and set boundaries or just walk away.

 Dating a Nigerian: Are You Ready to Take the Plunge?

There will always be situations where it’s hard to navigate interracial dating. In a world where there are millions of cultures and traditions, you need to meet halfway to make it work. You’ve got to respect each other’s culture and show interest in theirs if you want to make your relationship work.

When you find common ground and discuss your negotiables and non-negotiables in relationships, dating a Nigerian man might turn into one of the best relationships you’ll ever have. 

John Santana

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